Some random pregnancy thoughts

Sometimes I get freaked out thinking OMG I'm about to be responsible for another human FOREVER. I hope this is normal. But I found a cure for this anxiety. Baby leggings. I started browsing them last night and they are so freaking cute. I stayed up an hour past my bedtime, but it was so worth it.

Baby hats are a VERY close second. My teammate just gave me a whole bunch of amazingly cute ones. Here's my favorite.

The little spikes. I die.

I called a daycare center and left a message saying that my husband and I would need care for our son and then I was like WTF AM I SAYING it sounded so weird that I could barely leave my phone number after that.

I can feel him moving all the time now and I love it so much. It's usually just sort of random weirdness but occasionally I can feel harder movements that I assume are kicks/punches. Eric has felt some too!

I joined a gym. Rejoined the YMCA, actually. It's across the street, somewhat cheap, and there's no joining fee so I can just do a month to month and quit when the baby arrives. I'd been considering it for awhile, with running getting on my nerves more and more. It's actually felt good recently, but I don't have any delusions that will last.

Last night I went to Body Sculpt, a weight lifting class. I figured I'd just do what I could and modify as necessary, but it was almost all upper body work so I actually could do all the moves. Not that I was lifting heavy weights, but you get the idea. This morning, I went to spin class. I forgot how much I loooove spin class. I think it was the first prego workout where I actually looked forward to the future when I can go full force. Usually I'm 100% comfortable half assing and phoning it in. I think this YMCA think is a good move.

I went to dinner with some friends after work at Corner Bakery and got desserts to bring home for me and Eric. I got him a chocolate chip cookie, and me a lemon bar. I choose lemon over chocolate, no regrets. Hormones are so weird.

Speaking of hormones, there's no middle ground any more between "slightly sad" and "sobbing". I started seriously crying at the end of Game of Thrones when they flashed the "3 episodes left".

Full disclosure - I have tears in my eyes just writing that.

My class is reading The Watson go to Birmingham. If you're not familiar, it's historical fiction dealing with the Birmingham church bombing that killed four black girls in 1963. As we got closer and closer to the chapter with the bombing, I was getting pretty nervous about teaching such a sad topic. It got to the point where I was crying just planning the lesson. I finally had to have my coworker take over and teach that day while I just sat in silence and tried to hold it together. Shining moment in my career.

I am slowly transitioning to maternity clothes. I only have one pair of pants that fit, length wise, and I am trying to just drag out my previously owned flowy dresses long enough to make it past pants season. It's practically memorial day, so I think I'm almost safe. 16 more days of school/"professional" outfits before I can wear pajamas 24/7.

Here's my one pair of maternity pants. Ignore my hair and face, this is how people look after a day of chasing children. I'll look better when I'm relaxed in the summer.

I think I had more but, pregnancy brain, and that's probably enough rambling anyway.

What anxiety keeps you up at night? Mine is often really mundane, like I'll wake up at 2am and realize I forgot to do some stupid paperwork and then be up for an hour and hate myself for failing at sleep.