Saturday, January 12, 2019

Credit where credit is due!

After posting my most recent blog post about my son's speech delay, I was absolutely beyond blown away by the response. My phone was blowing up with messages from people I hadn't spoken to in years, either offering support or sharing their own similar story. It's been amazing to be able to connect with other people I know that were going through their own struggles. 

As a thank you, here's a cute baby picture.

I mentioned in my post that in my experience, sharing that my child wasn't meeting a milestone on the typical timeline resulted in a certain type of response. "He'll get there in his own time." "He's a boy! He just wants to run and play." "So and so never spoke until X age and then began using sentences and was fine". These are all responses that come from a great place of support, with nothing but the best intentions. Trust me, I've typed and retyped a text to someone going through a challenge I've never dealt with, wondering how best to support them and I'm sure there's been plenty of times I've said the wrong thing. But as I mentioned, they can lend themselves to a head in the sand mindset.

The amazing thing about sharing my post was I got to hear the responses that I really needed to hear. "So and so wasn't speaking at X age... so we did a ton of therapy, practiced every single day, worked really hard as a family, fought for services, cried in the shower wondering what I had done wrong, what I could have done more of, how this will affect him throughout his life, laid awake at night, jumped up and down with crazy excitement at the smallest victories, never gave up...and he was fine!" I wish that story was out there a little more.

I now have a teeny tiny bit more respect for the big bloggers out there. I was actually overwhelmed replying to all the messages. If I didn't respond to yours, rest assured it made me cry in a happy, touching way, I intended to regroup and respond, and then a kid needed me. I got a lot of comments complimenting me for being a good mom or being brave to share - which is amazing, truly, and wonderful to hear. But I felt a bit guilty about it taking credit away from where it's truly due - Royce! I'm pretty sure an hour of therapy is equivalent to us taking the SATs. It's play based, of course, but he works hard and it doesn't end there, as we practice saying sounds with him all day every day. The PECS system he will be using to communicate (thanks to so many people who told me the name) was described as his SLP as learning a foreign language, so he really deserves alllllllll the compliments for already doing great with it in practice.

One important thing to know about Royce (probably ok to use his name now? idk) is that he is the happiest kid. And the most patient kid. Like, for real, he is #patientgoalz. I can only aspire to his level of zen and hope to get even halfway there (in like 20 years not now when I have little kids). He will point to something and just stay so cool and collected while I fumble through trying to figure out what he means and name it for him. Like any 2 year old, he likes to announce the exciting things he sees around him, but since he isn't able to yet, he relies on us to do his commentating while he directs us.
Always jumping, always patient, always sweet

Moving on to other random updates.

This week was both a win and a fail. I did five workouts (according to my FitBit), which is a huge accomplishment. However, only one of them was running, and it was with the double stroller, so a wog at best. Plus, Royce fell asleep and then didn't nap at home, so a true loss.

  • Half a Body Pump class (before childcare came and got me because screaming baby)
  • Free Forest hike with the kids (my FitBit counted this, therefore I count this)
  • 20 minute HIIT workout with Jackie and ALL THE KIDS AWAKE and no other adults helping
  • 2 mile double stroller hell
  • An hour of jumping with the boys at the trampoline park
Not the most traditional but I'm sore and it felt hard, TWSS. Jackie is out of town this weekend so clearly my motivation without her kind of sucks. In my defense, I was going to run on the treadmill today but the trampoline park was unexpected and my heart rate was really high the whole time, so, not doubling down.



Bedsharing. I'm pretty sure somewhere along the way I said something about how do people do that and joke's on me, because now I love it. Dalton always ended up in our bed as a baby. Remi was starting to go down the same route. Royce never did, always slept fine in first the rock and play (don't report me to sanctimommies for this please) and then the crib, as proof that sleep is kid dependent and not a result of parenting. I never slept well when she ended up there because I was anxious. Once I just embraced it and made my bed safe with a firm mattress (took off my memory foam topper) and bedrails and no extra pillows, I started sleeping so much better. BRB knocking on all the wood. I rarely have to fully wake up, when she starts fussing to eat I just move towards her and latch her on and conk back out. No clue how many times that happens or what time it is when it happens and that's how I like it. So, yeah, I'm in the crunchy club, I think. I mean, we use cloth diapers. But I also bribe them with lollipops and Paw Patrol. Not sure what parenting label that leaves me with. I like to call myself "any port in a storm".

I feel I should update about Dalton since I haven't mentioned him! Even though my other updates were mainly just about me. He's just keeping on keeping on, saying ridiculously funny four year old things and being the best helper a mom could ever ask for.

He's also practicing his photography skills, as seen below.

I'm proud to say our Christmas tree is already down and it didn't take till March.

Also, Remi is now 7 months! Actually, 7.5. She's obsessed with food, as we do the pretentiously named baby led weaning. She can now sit up, scoot, and wants to crawl so badly but can't quite get there yet. Since she learned to sit up on New Year's Day, she's suddenly so much more chill and will happily sit on the floor and play with toys. The sweet spot for sure - able to sit, not able to move (much)!

No more sitting quietly for monthly pictures!

She's starting to get into people other than me and her brothers - giving her dear old dad a chance.

And that's all I have to say about that (for now). 

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