I avoided giving birth on the news

 

Less than two weeks till the due date! In case anyone forgot. I sure didn't.

THERE'S AN ACTUAL BABY INSIDE ME.

Supposedly the baby is still growing at the same rate, but based on my hunger levels I can only assume he's quickly morphing into a giant before delivery.

This is my life lately.



Except actually not, because teachers have set lunch times and we don't get snack time in fifth grade. I just try to cram it all in with three gigantic meals a day and then feel miserable. It's a good plan. My lunch time this year is 1pm, which I guess is a normal lunch time, but last year it was noon. I don't know if it's the baby or just that I've been trained to eat at 12pm like one of Pavlov's dogs, but that last hour is killer. I finally brought in some pretzels that I can eat if things really get desperate. First world pain, it fills my life.

I'm still far from miserable, especially since this week isn't 105 degrees in my classroom every day. I probably would be quite miserable if my coworkers weren't so awesome. To start with, they constantly cover me so I can take my round the clock hourly bathroom break. Then, I was supposed to go on a field trip yesterday.

The Cliff's notes version was that we were going somewhere (Fort McHenry, the birthplace of our national anthem, if you care) that would require an entire day of standing and walking outside. I wasn't too concerned about that, not ideal, but I could handle it. But the trip was estimated to have over 7,000 people going to a tiny piece of land surrounded on three sides by water, which meant a major bottle neck effect to get in or out. That was the part that concerned me a bit.

I planned to just have Eric take the hospital bag in his car, and worst case scenario, he would come get me. Not ideal, since he's also a teacher and can't just peace out from work at a moment's notice. Furthermore, I have this thing called Strep B which is no big deal, it just means if your water breaks, you need to get to the hospital asap for antibiotics. That's actually all I know because for once I made wise choices and just took my doctor at her word and didn't follow up with a WebMD induced panic attack. For me, it also means that everywhere I go other than work, I have a mental contingency plan for how to quickly get to the hospital, which I probably would have done anyway.

Anyway, one of my amazing coworkers stepped up and went with my class in my place. I didn't even have to endure a single nightmare about ending up with my birth story on the six o'clock news. I can't even describe just how far my anxiety went down.

Today I went to what was billed as a faculty meeting, and it turned out to be a surprise baby shower! Eric was even invited and had rushed over after his school dismissed to surprise me. Once again, he fulfilled his duty of entertaining and took on the monumental task of making things less awkward when I'm the center of attention.

Co-ed showers are the way to go.

I was so shocked I couldn't even process that he was there. I mean, it should have been obvious since it's so close to the end, and we never have faculty meetings on Wednesdays, and my teammates made me late cornering me in my room asking me random questions, but I've never been known for my all star connecting the dots skills. The same wonderful person who took over my field trip knew from my blog that we were in pretty solid shape as far as baby stuff goes, so she arranged that we mainly got diapers, wipes, and books. It was just so perfect.

I'm really way too excited about that basket and don't know what I should fill it with.

Since I'm overflowing with rare loving, happy hormones, share the best part of your job today!