Thursday, January 17, 2013

5 Common Cliches about Runners - Debunked!

Or at least proven wrong in my life within the past 24 hours.

1. Runners are slaves to the training plan 

I had to do a little switcheroo this week. I was supposed to do 14 on Wednesday, and 6 on Friday. I was mentally prepping all day Wednesday and actually really had my head in the game to wake up at 4:15, run 14 miles, then teach all day, do after school tutoring, and then work at Charm City Run (and we even had an event, to really keep my on my toes). The breaking point was the near-freezing rain when I went to bed. Friday is supposed to be dry, plus I only have to stay awake through ONE job. I slept in until 5:30 and somehow managed to convince myself to leave my nice, soft, warm bed to go outside and run in nasty cold rain (6 miles at 9:37 pace). 

This might only be funny to teachers, but it's seriously my life. This week a kid raised his hand to tell me his tongue itched. He "just wanted me to know it was still happening". 

2. Runners don't think short workouts count

This plan is tough but one thing lines up perfectly with my schedule - rest/cross training days on Thursdays. I always do a two-a-day on Wednesday, so I don't get home from Charm City until around 9:30pm, and then I don't really want to go straight to bed without dinner like some little kid being punished. So by the time I actually get into bed it's more like 11, and a 5:30 run is unlikely. I start one of my grad classes tonight, so now evening workouts are out. This morning I once again slept in, this time until 6:20, and did my girl Jillian Michaels' 30 Day Shred, Level 2. It's only 25 minutes including warm up and cool down, but don't be fooled, 20 of those minutes are pure unadulterated hell. 

3. No one is more obsessed with the weather than runners

This one is usually true, unless a group of teachers get wind of the tiniest, most remote chance that we might see a hint of a snowflake. 

When that happens, everyone goes nuts and suddenly turns into amatuer meterologists. Your Facebook feed will be covered with teachers' statuses asking everyone for their predictions (snow day? late arrival? early dismissal?), your phone will be blowing up with texts and emails discussing various models that they found online, and everyone starts making promises to God in exchange for a snow day, like "I swear I'll spend the entire morning grading papers in my pajamas if you just give us ONE DAY". If you thought kids got excited for snow days (I wouldn't really know, upstate NY does not follow this trend of "canceling school due to snow"), you have no idea. This was the case last night, but unfortunately, its not looking good.

4. Runners only eat healthy foods

A lot of runners are all like "I only eat superfoods AT ALL TIMES except for two special occasions a year when I eat like the rest of the disgusting American public but the rest of the time it's kale and lean protein with an organic whole wheat carb once a week". Obviously I've been devoting years on this blog to debunking this myth. I'm more like "I eat healthy at all times except when its time for dessert or when I go out or when I'm with friends or when I have a craving, or especially if any free food is offered to me". This attitude helps me out big time when we have events at work, because we always have a food spread, and I always step up and take one for the team and eliminate the threat of temptation by bringing all the leftovers home for me and Eric. Last night there was an entire cheese, meat, and pepperoni tray that had barely been touched. I called Eric to see if he wanted it (I thought he had already eaten) and his reaction was along the lines of if I'd called to say "they're giving away free money, do you think I should grab some?". He had it demolished before I went to bed. Last time I made out even better with a bag of Ghirardelli chocolates! 

5. There's only one type of special bath for runners

Me: "Guess who I have a date with tomorrow?"
Eric: "ummmm...."
Me: "I'll give you a clue - one of us will be in the bath."
Eric: "Ice?"

As exciting as an ice bath would be, apparently, my hot bath date is with this guy.

Now that the threat of snow is off the table, looking forward to that will be what gets me through the day. 

Which of these myths have you debunked?


  1. Yesterday, Mike and I were watching the news and all of the schools in the state were closed because of the snow...except for our town, we had a 90 min delay. I'd hate to be a teach here. It's always like that.

    Obviously, I only eat the healthiest possible foods. Those pictures I send you of desserts are pulled from the internet.

    1. 90 min delays were not even worth it! You dont get to enjoy sleeping in like you can on the rare occasion when they call it the night before - because you are wide awake after you get that 5am phone call. Then you have to double your normal travel time because the roads will still be crappy. That's how it was in NJ anyway.

  2. I hope I help people realize not all runners start the day with plain yogurt and frozen certain other people I know. :)

    It's ok, at least you don't eat plain yogurt and brown rice before a run like Perry. That's just gross.

  3. Still laughing over the ice bath comment haha. I have another myth that can be debunked: Runners never drink. We know you have debunked this one many a time, and especially when Olivia and Veronica take over Alumni Weekend.

  4. I am always switching the days around on my training plan, I figure as long as I get them all in each week what's the difference. I usually do eat pretty healty compared to your average american but I also love nachos and beer. I run so I can eat nachos and drink on the regular.

  5. Are you in Rochester?! And I love the exchange between you and eric about the bath. Hilarious.

  6. Your teacher questions comic makes me laugh...I'm a wildlife educator and run school programs across western Nebraska, and that comic is so true! I also enjoy that when I ask if there are questions, I usually get several kids offering to tell me about "this one time my brother and I..." When I ask them if it's a question or a story, they usually know that it's a story, but then the hands go right back up, "I was wondering, this one time my brother and I saw a mountain lion and..."

  7. Hahaha. Excellent job living outside of the runner mold.

  8. I think healthy living bloggers give the rest of us runners a bad name. It's not that runners don't drink. It's just that the Hash House Harriers don't have time to blog....they're too busy drinking beer!

    I debunk the healthy eating one a lot. I try to follow the "paleo guidelines" but I eat sugar/dessert like every night.

    I actually ate a cupcake at lunch today. Why? Because I figured it would motivate me to run later this afternoon. I ate a cupcake, so I really should go to the gym. Uuuuh, we'll see how that works out.

  9. this is a great post! um, let's see...#4. right now i'm eating a self-made ice cream sandwich and it's only 7pm...which means i'll have another snack before bed. probably won't be too healthy too.


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