Tuesday, November 3, 2015

Pregnancy #2: all the details you never wanted

I'd heard that no two pregnancies are the same but hearing it and living it are two very different things. It could not be more true for me, this pregnancy compared to my pregnancy with Dalton are night and day! The ONE thing that is the same is that I developed a coffee aversion early on. Sad but true. I'm hoping that it comes back into my life at some point in the second tri, as it did before. I'll explain the main differences by categories.

Morning Sickness: I never had a moment of sickness with Dalton. I always said I could have been on "I didn't know I was pregnant", because I really had no symptoms. This time around, it's been a more stereotypical pregnancy. Nausea, weird cravings (clearly), random aversions, and generally feeling hungover most of the time. I definitely can't complain, because it hasn't been bad compared to what some women go through, but it's all new for me. I had a sweets aversion for a few weeks - like, could not tolerate anything remotely sweet, fruit, peanut butter, NOTHING. I didn't even touch a cupcake at Dalton's birthday party. Luckily, that's slowly letting up. Still, I think it's better to have this annoying symptom the second time around since I actually feel confident it will be worth it.

There's no good picture for that, look at this instead.

Exhaustion: Of course I was tired before, every adult ever is always tired. But I never felt that bone crushing exhaustion of the first trimester. This time, I sure do. Obviously, having an active one year old to care for adds a whole new element that wasn't there before, but I think it's more than that. It's an exhaustion that no amount of sleep can help. I've been going to bed the same time as Dalton (which is about 7pm) because I feel like I can't remain vertical even one second longer. On the weekends, his nap time is often my nap time.

Running: Pregnant running: fun for no one. Unless you have a $50 running for two tank top so you can brag (which I don't). I always thought that the big belly and extra weight were what made pregnant running a challenge. But it turns out that doing stuff like creating a brain and nervous system are taxing on the body, and all that starts way before you become enormous. Compared to my last pregnancy, my running now is a joke. If I can get 15-20 minutes in (which I do, most days), I'm thrilled with myself. Side note - this also explains why I'm only on episode 5 of Undisclosed. I don't really bother comparing though, because I got pregnant with Dalton shortly after running a 50 mile race, and I got pregnant with #2 shortly after a 10 mile race that I may or may not have been prepared for. Not the same. Throw in morning sickness and the added responsibility of a toddler, and that's why I now consider 15 minutes of slow jogging on the treadmill a stellar workout. But, I did run five stroller miles on Sunday!

Insomnia: I think I had this pretty bad before too, but this time I have an amazing secret weapon - Unisom. Nectar of the Gods. My doctor approved me to take it around 9 weeks, and I've slept so gloriously since then. Prior to that, I seriously read three books in the middle of the night due to pregnancy insomnia. (Orphan #8, The Language of Miracles, and The One and Only, for anyone interested, and now I'm reading The Nightingale). The worst part was that Dalton finally started sleeping through the night just about when I saw the second line, right before his first birthday, and I couldn't even enjoy it!

Body: So far, about the same. My pants are getting tight, I break out the belly bands on occasion, but definitely nowhere near showing yet. I hear you blow up quicker with the second pregnancy, so we will see. I packed on the weight right away with Dalton, though not exclusively in the belly. I specifically remember asking my doctor if I gained too much in the first tri and she was like...well, not much we can do about it now. And this time I haven't gained any weight yet. #ZOMGhealthypregnancyskinniestfetusever Obviously that's directly related to my sweets aversion. I'm sure I'll pack it on shortly. I just ate some heath bar ice cream.

Judging you

Emotions: With Dalton, I think I was well into the second trimester before I even got my head around being pregnant. It wasn't until the third that I began to accept that a baby was coming, and really, even then, I was in denial while in labor. This time, it didn't seem quite so crazy. Right away, I started thinking about what life would be like with the new baby - both the excitement and the fear. Of course, like most second timers, I'm sure, 90% of it centered around how it would affect Dalton, and the other 10% was wondering how I could possibly care for a toddler and a newborn. But, obviously, billions of women have done it and survived, and I'm sure I will too. I'm pretty stuck on the newborn/toddler phase - I haven't fantasized about them playing together while older or anything yet. Maybe in time.

The burning questions we've been asked:

Maybe because we've always said we wanted to wait for a second, but right away most people have asked: is this is a "surprise" baby? Nope! This baby is very much intended and wanted, although it was a bit of an impulse baby. What can I say, we changed our minds! We always knew we wanted more children, and (cheesy sentiment alert) Dalton has brought more joy to our lives than we ever could have imagined, so....we wanted to do it again! I'm close with my siblings and so grateful I grew up with them, and I want that for Dalton (and the new baby).

Dalton in the hospital, teeny tiny

Our main reason for waiting was not wanting to pay for 2 kids in daycare, but we'll be paying for it at some point regardless. Yeah, it will suck to see that bill, but then, when they are both in school, think how rich we will feel? Neither of us are spring chickens (I'm 32 and Eric is 35) and we both like the idea of expanding our family sooner, rather than later. We barely remember sleep (although, I'm re-learning and it's lovely), and might as well get the diapers/bottles/etc out of the way in one fell swoop. So, here we are!

Boy or girl? We don't know, and aren't finding out! With Dalton, I could barely wait until the anatomy scan, but this time I'm really thrilled to be surprised (and Eric is less than thrilled, but he's on board). I was inspired by my sister, who waited to find out with my 3 month old niece. Her experience was so exciting that I wanted to try it! I'd love to have a girl as well as a boy, but having a boy has been amazing, and (I hope) two brothers so close in age would have so much fun! As long as the baby is healthy, we're happy.

Will you have another c-section? This is something I've agonized over enough for it's own separate post, but in short - probably. I haven't fully 100% committed (and don't really need to yet), but it makes sense for a lot of reasons.
Eric, while I was in the OR.
I think I covered all the bases here! I've received more than one comment along the lines of "most blogs suck once the blogger gets pregnant, but I keep reading yours", so it's my hope and goal to continue that tradition. Having two kids will most likely put me firmly in mommy blogger territory, if I'm not there already, but I'll do my best. Thank you so much for all the sweet comments and congratulations!

What's the weirdest pregnancy symptom you've heard of? Last time, my teeth got so sensitive I could barely eat for a few days.

Kids close together in age: is it a do or a don't? Obviously, a do.


  1. Congratulations! Kids close together is totally a do! My kids are 17 months apart, and having them back to back was so great. My youngest is just one, and the kids have been actually playing with each other for a few months and it is the best. thing. ever. The baby stuff and toddler stuff is so fun, and the the "bad" parts (no sleep, gross diapers, pumping) aren't tough to return to if you never got away from them.

    As for weird symptoms, with both my pregnancies, I would sneeze and sneeze if I got too hungry.

    1. Yay!! Thank you so much for sharing! I'm so excited for that moment someday!

  2. Not sure about pregnancy symptoms, but kids close together is a DO! (probably easier said than done though!) Also, who are these people asking you if your baby was a surprise? I hope they are really close friends! It's so strange the personal questions that people will ask when it comes to pregnancy.

  3. I'm sure this will all change when/if we have kiddos, but man. Pregnancy is terrifying to me.

  4. My dad would totally ask if a pregnancy was planned.. but hopefully only to me and possibly my brother/SIL. That doesn't make it any less rude but it's just his lack of filter.
    I got Bell's palsy during my last pregnancy. No idea if it was a pregnancy symptom or just a coincidence but it was definitely weird. Not having any muscle control on one side of your face for a week is crazy but also hilarious. I didn't even skip work for it.. just warned my coworkers that I looked like a freak.

  5. Mike is still mad I never had weird cravings with Leif. He was all excited to try weird food combinations with me.

    I love Leif and he's awesome, but it's so much work and I hated pregnancy so much that if there is a Ricig #2, it won't be for a while.

  6. I think having two kids is a ton of work no matter the spacing, so you might as well have them on whatever schedule works best for you :)

    I'm more interested in potential names than sex. Daltina is my suggestion for a girl.

    1. I vote for Timothy. So then we can call and ask for Timothy Dalton.

  7. This is probably a TMI question, but you blogged very openly about trying for 6 months to get pregnant with Dalton.Was it easier the second time around? Or do you think you were better at planning and knowing what to look for after the first pregnancy?
    Congrats!! So exciting!

    1. I don't mind sharing at all! It took a year with Dalton, so we were pretty surprised when this one happened right away. I didn't chart or use ovulation strips or anything this time either. People say you are more fertile the second time - apparently it's true! I may post about it since comments on blogger are weird and it doesn't tell people when you reply to their comment.

  8. My brothers and I are 13 and 15 years apart in age (same parents). I gotta say, it's awesome not being close in age too. I loved it so much because they would take me out to the movies and put-put and I'd have sleepovers at their apartment. I have awesome memories growing up having much older brothers.

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