Tuesday, April 22, 2014

My best diet tips


I've donned my labcoat and crunched the numbers. It seems that most people hope I'm wrong, which is hardly a surprise.



In news that shocked me (in a happy way), people other than our immediate family apparently want to know! I feel so special.

I basically can't even think about our sonogram on Tuesday because the anticipation is so out of control that I'll then become even more useless than I already am.

I had a really exciting and crazy day, but unfortunately I can't share any of that on the internet. But I did try a buffalo burger for the first time (Eric's dinner choice).

Trying to show the burger - it looks like every burger I've ever seen.
See that broccoli? It's part of this new thing I'm doing, called "let's try not to give birth at 200 lbs". So far, I haven't really been following that plan. I usually eat fairly healthy meals (not the ones shown on here, because they're boring) but also lots of dessert. Like, take what you think is a lot, then double it. Now double that.

I intended to start yesterday. But then, I had a panic attack at the realization that I wouldn't eat another Reese's egg, Cadbury egg, or peep for an entire YEAR. I was also starving. I woke up around 9 (it was the last day of spring break). Then I couldn't eat because literally everything except for cottage cheese and hardboiled eggs sounded repulsive, but I was too lazy to go to the store to get them. So it was like 2pm by the time I bought them and then the hunger was affecting my decision making so I went to Target and bought all the discount candy I could carry (some of it was for Eric, in my defense) and binged on it, but waaaaay later that night after I had my cottage cheese and eggs.

Cool story, bro.

My BFF Carolyn is a fellow pregger and she suggested this radical idea of eating fruit after dinner (I will not call it dessert). I tried it.


It wasn't the worst thing ever. I could theoretically stick with it a few days a week, especially if the internet holds me accountable.

Also, the universe wanted me to stop being a fatty.

My twitter name is as creative as my instagram name
It all started when I got on the scale on Friday. This is always, always a bad decision unless you've just recovered from stomach flu.

Even worse, I looked at a stupid babycenter message board titled "how much weight did you gain at 18 weeks?". I learned long before I was pregnant that babycenter is THE WORST, but sometimes it still sucks me in. I should know better, especially since most posts have like a 30% chance of referring to the "babby".

I'd really like to hop off the Jessica Simpson train, although I did have a burger on a huge, gluten filled white bun (and did you see all that salt on top? amazing), so I'm not going to extreme measures.

Now let's all admire a bump selfie and shower me with compliments. Kidding. Seriously, don't.

I'm not arching my back, my whootie just gives that illusion
Trust me, this guy compliments me more than all the blog readers in the world ever could.

Here's an unrelated question: what's the protocol on responding to blog comments on blogger? If I respond, the person doesn't get a notification that I responded. But I don't want to look like a jerk and ignore them either. I got a comment yesterday from anonymous that made my day, it was about how I'm approaching pregnancy in a non - Pinterest way, the highest compliment I could ever receive. So ....thoughts? Should I respond in the comments, in a post, not at all?


 
Most ridiculous diet tip you've ever heard: and go. I was once told not to drink cold water if I wanted to lose weight (which, incidentally, I didn't at the time).
 

 

 

17 comments:

  1. I say respond by email. I rarely go back to check the comments after I comment on a post so I probably wouldn't see your reply. That might be a good thing. You can call me a bitch and I'll probably never know...and then others can snicker.

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  2. Did you know that Jessica Simpson used to eat butter on her PopTarts? I read that in a magazine on one of my flights home, and almost threw up. Girl took things to a whole different level!

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    Replies
    1. I think I'm going to go vomit up my breakfast now.

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    2. Ok I get that it's bad for you and a million calories, but isn't it basically like a glorified PB&J? I'm missing the vomit-inducing part....

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    3. Reading comprehension fail. BUTTER is gross. Peanut butter, which I read it as, sounds ok.

      Delete
  3. I am a bad responder, I email respond but if they are a noreply blogger there isn't much I can do except visit their blog if they have one.
    Love the bump and the diet tips.

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  4. Hard boiled eggs and cottage cheese were the only thing that sounded non-vomit inducing? I'm not even sure where to go with this.

    When I couldn't keep anything down, fruit was really the only thing I did eat. It's basically flavored water, right?

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    Replies
    1. If I craved fruit, my life would be very different. I wish I knew what that was like.

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  5. I respond to the comment if they are a noreply-blogger....not much else you can do.

    And you do not remotely look like you are on the Jessica Simpson train! Your bump is adorable! And that burger looks freaking delicious. Salted white bun? YES PLEASE.

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  6. If it's a nonreply commentor, I just reply to the comment and hope they come back and check. People can subscribe to the comments and get notified when they have a reply so that's the only option beyond them actually having a profile with an email attached.

    I wouldn't worry about pregnancy weight gain. I mean, the more gain, the more inspirational your return to glory will be, right?

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    Replies
    1. In that case, 200lbs here I come!

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  7. I lost weight in the first trimester (thanks to being nauseous at the thought of everything except grilled cheese) and am apparently going through a growth spurt right now. Society makes pregnancy weight gain way too stressful, but for now I'm balancing my DQ cravings with breakfast smoothies. I'm also jealous that you are getting your anatomy scan next week (I'm also 18 weeks). I have to wait until the 5th!

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    Replies
    1. Most of the people in the message board said the same, and I am NOT jealous of that morning sickness! So I guess this is a happy trade off! Society makes it way too stressful, I wish I didn't have the internet informing me that everyone had gained 20% of what I have by now. So exciting you are 18 weeks too - we can predict you next!

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  8. "I've donned my labcoat and crunched the numbers." Well done, Dr. I. B. Emerson!

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  9. If I don't get an email that says my comment has a response that I only come back about 5% of the time. I hate checking the "notify me" of news comments box because that leads to way too many emails.

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  10. It could be argued for ages, which diet is the best. What is beyond arguing is that your diet should provide enough nutrients for your body. I have read a research conducted by nutrition scientists, studying how to effectively refill the supplies of your body, while sticking to vegeterian diet. It could be especially interesting for athletes. See details at http://bit.ly/QrC7AN

    ReplyDelete

Thanks for commenting! Comments make me probably more happy than they should.