I am busier and therefore more important than you and here is why

Let’s talk about why it took me two weeks to write a single post. (Although I did write this post and get paid $15. I've never been paid to write before and $15 buys like half a month of diapers. Almost.)



Amazing photo courtesy of my mom!



Just kidding, he's perfect and can do no wrong. The problem, as usual, is that I'm not a lady of leisure.

Lately, my life consists of managing to fit in three things. Keeping Dalton alive, keeping myself alive, and trying not to get fired.

 

 

We are living in a disaster zone. I managed to clean before my parents’ visit by just not going to bed after feeding Dalton at 3:45 am, and this was on a work day. Luckily for the internet and world at large, I am willing to spend this morning’s two hour delay blogging about how I have no time and ignore the fact that every article of clothing we own is clean on our living room floor.

Before our floor was a war zone.

 

I always thought I was fairly good at time management, but that’s gone down the tubes. In order to wake up at the crack of dawn to do a tiny bit of exercise, I go to bed the same time as a 4 month old. Then I read approximately half a sentence of my book and pass out. I’ve been at 18% on the same book on my kindle for like 3 weeks. Let’s not even talk about how behind we are on our TV shows. It’s embarrassing. Also we totally don’t need any time together as a couple. Overrated. We can talk while we give Dalton his bath.

 

When we get home, I start the balancing act of not wanting to waste a single precious second together, yet needing to be entirely ready for bed before starting Dalton’s bedtime routine and getting absolutely every single thing ready for the morning to streamline that process. And, you know, eating dinner myself. That happens through a combination of babywearing and running around like a crazy woman during evening naptime. I really don’t understand where the time goes because every night I am sure I’ll have time to go above and beyond and do actual house cleaning, and not just the minimum amount of chores needed to get us through the next day, and every night that doesn’t happen.

 To further assist me in failing at life, tomorrow I begin a required class to teach fifth grade heath that is 3 hours after work. So I'll be away from my baby for 13 hours. Pretty sure the Geneva Conventions should ban that because it's cruel and inhuman.

This post is not all a complaint. I have mastered some important skills. I can now literally feed my child while I am sleeping. I can pump while driving. I can eat lunch in under 5 minutes while pumping. I can pump and soothe a baby simultaneously (ok most of these skills involve pumping). I can also speed up pumping (slightly) by using one arm to press down on the pumps and the other to type one handed on my laptop and therefore continue working. I have bruises to prove it. And I never bruise.

#mommymartyr

This is how I spend my nights now.

I'm actually changing the name of this blog to pumping is my life. Note - NOT one day's worth, unfortunately.

Weekends, it’s amazing how much time grocery shopping and prepping meals for the week takes up. I could actually spend more time on my weekends being productive, but then I wouldn’t have any fodder for a whiny blog post, so instead I spend the rest of the time having fun. Family time, coffee with my BFF, trying new workout classes, and mommy night with my fellow pumping teacher buddies.

 

 

 

They have girls. I laughed at him in pink and promoted gender stereotypes.

It's true though.

I need more ways to combine necessary activities in order to introduce TV back into my life. Ideally learning to pump on the treadmill. Or possibly clean and sleep.